My First Trip to Atlantic City!

I know, crazy. I've been a resident of New Jersey since the age of 5 and I have never been to Atlantic City...until last week. It was quite the experience.

I gambled $5 because I never gambled before and didn't know what I was doing. I won $6 and then lost it all. Oops.

The nightlife was interesting as well. People were dressed more scantily than I expected. Apparently, my long-sleeved lace getup was too classy. I took notes of the proper trashy attire for the next time I head down south of Jersey. I need to look the part.

I could tell you more, but what happens in AC stays in AC. Have you ever been?

Why I Love Nicki Minaj!

Nicki in Times Square for Nokia Lumia 900

I don't care who knows. I love Nicki! This was proven to me when I saw a surprise performance from her earlier this month and FREAKED out when she came on the stage. I was on the verge of tears. Yeah, I'm that fan.

I have been listening to her new album since the week it dropped. And well, I am impressed. Like I've said in previous posts, I love Nicki because she is a power femme who isn't afraid to do what she wants as an artist. Yeah, her look is a little crazy, but for some reason I dig it. I will admit, when her sophomore album debuted, I was scared that it would suck and all her Barbz (me included) would throw her the deuces and tell her ass to kick rocks. But to my pleasure, Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded is BEYOND amazing.

She does everything from her hardcore rap to her dance hall music. The best part is all the collaborations she has: Nas, Cam'Ron, Rick Ross, Beenie Man, Chris Brown (I'm a little annoyed by that one) and so much more. Taking a look back at her first album, what other rapper would put Natasha Bedingfield on a song? Exactly. No one, but Nicki. She's a genius and I love that she doesn't feel the need to place herself into one musical genre. Arguably, no other female rapper has been able to transcend into Pop music faster than Nicki.

Now tell me that's not a legend in the making.

Friendships Come in Different Forms

Over the past year I've learned that friendships are dynamic and come in different forms; acquaintance, friend, almost best friend, and etc. I've also learned that friendships are not worth chasing if the person you are after is not willing to reciprocate the "love."

People are busy and people have lives. I get it. But I believe people can also make time for people they truly care about. We live in a time where briefly connecting with someone can be done via text, phone, email, social media and etc. So if you find yourself constantly reaching out to someone and that person doesn't seem to have time for you, well then my friend. Tell that person to kick rocks, but hold no animosity. Just realize that "friend" is just an acquaintance and not someone you can count on when you're in dire need. And that's okay.

Ultimately, I think it's important to know where your friendship stands with certain people because not everyone deserves to know every itty bitty thing about you. As my mother always said to me growing up, "Don't go telling people your business." (One can argue that's what I'm doing with this whole blogging thing, but erm, trust me. There's a lot you guys don't know about me.) Anyway...

My favorite form of friendship is the best friend.

This is the girl or guy you tell everything. You share the same sense of humor and again, tell each other ev-er-y-thing. EVERYTHING. Someone who is basically your sister from another mister or brother from another mother. There's nothing you can't tell each other. You can be brutally honest with each other and call each other out when one of you is acting crazy. They know when you will or won't like something, they understand you and your weirdness (we're all a little weird) and they know how to calm you down. You also support and lift each other up in every aspect of your lives. You could go months without seeing this person, but when you reconnect, it's like time hasn't passed. This person gets you.

Ah, I do love my best friends.

My First EDM Concert: Kaskade

I've been a longtime fan of Electric Dance Music (EDM) and love all the play it is currently getting. A lot of people don't get it, but a lot of people do. EDM has a large spectrum. From Lady Gaga to Kaskade, EDM ranges in sound and likability. As a long time Kaskade fan, I was so happy that at the end of 2010 (during my senior year of college) two of my friends agreed to tag-along for a Kaskade concert.

The place was packed and filled with a lot of people smoking (indoor?!?!). Kaskade took forever to get out and by the time he came out, he played original songs. I expected to hear my favorites. Womp. It wasn't the best time, but it was still fun.

My Face on The StyleCaster Homepage

I recently got the opportunity to work with StyleCaster.com on a New York Fashion Week piece. I had to reflect on what it was like being a part of an underrepresented group in the fashion industry. I like how it came out.

Read the article here.

SH*T MY NIGERIAN DAD SAYS

So... I started a new YouTube channel. I haven't updated in two weeks, but I will very soon. I have vlog and skitches (my term for skits) looming in my head I think you guys will find funny. In the meantime, watch this one below.

Why I Blog & Why You Should Too

Computer geek from a wee age.

I was 10 when I started blogging. Live Journal, Geocities, AOL Hometown and Xanga were my weapons of choice. It was an instant addiction and I've never looked back.

Blogging now is slightly different than it was when I first started, but it's still hella fun.

Back in the day you blogged about whatever the heck you wanted, named names (or not?) and gave intimate details about your life. The idea was your friends and classmates would get a glimpse into your life outside of school. There were really no consequences for the things you said online. I thought it was pretty cool. It was also the passive aggressive way of telling people more about yourself. I mean now there's Tumblr, so it's sort of revived the old form of diarrhea blogging.

Now, you have bloggers turning their blogs into full-on businesses and raking in serious dough. Bloggers are the new age of influencers. I believe that anyone can be a blogger, but not everyone is a Blogger. Just because you have a Tumblr that you mostly reblog pictures and things, does not give you the right to wield a business card that says you're a Blogger. Sorry, I'm not sorry. It's the truth. But this isn't to say you shouldn't blog. I think everyone should blog and share their life and thoughts, sparingly.

I take blogging seriously because it's kind of an art form to me. And in this art, I've noticed that there are certain things that make a blogger successful.

a) You must blog frequently. What's the point in having a blog if you're not going to update it? You most likely have at least one person reading your blog and leaving them hanging is kind of rude don't cha think? Hm?

b) The layout of your blog must be decent. This is one I am an absolute snob about. If your layout is lame, it's too distracting and I (or a lot of people) probably won't read your text.

c) You must be yourself. Trying to be a copy of someone else doesn't really work off-line or online—except if you're a style blogger. Zing! Yep I said it. You're all carbon copies and I often hate-read you. The only truly successful bunch are the ones that take a different approach to (style) blogging and put in the extra effort.

d) Do it because you love it. Blogging can turn into a lucrative business for anyone, but if that is your only purpose in getting into blogging, you will hate it. There are long hours involved and a lot of late night/early morning writing.

So you say you don't want to turn blogging into some ginormous business, you're just doing it for fun? Well that's great. There really is no rhyme or reason to how you should blog, it's all about why you do it.

I'll talk more about why you should blog next week Thursday at NYCreative Interns event during Social Media Week. Stop by and say hi! Details here.

Scarlett's Death: (Almost) 1 Year Later

Well, it's been about a year since my best friend Scarlett passed.

Up until the 1 year anniversary of her death (Jan. 17th), I missed her every single day. I thought about how if she was still here, she'd either be in grad school getting her MFA or completing all the picture projects we had in mind.

It's really just weird not having her around still. It really is. But I know I'll eventually be at peace.

On the anniversary of her death, I didn't have much time to think. My job and other worries kept me busy so there was no time for me to breakdown and cry (I did that the night before). But as I type this, tears stream down my face because I just feel a hole in my heart and I don't know if it will ever be filled.

I just know that life must and has to go on.

I Used to Scoop Ice Cream in High School

My old Maggie Moo's fam with the Mayor of our town at the time!

I recently read an interview with Amy Astley where she said the following:

"... I love seeing someone who scooped ice cream or was a waitress. To me, it means they had to make some money and they had a job dealing with the public." —Amy Astley, Teen Vogue EIC

The entire interview was pretty enthralling. It was interesting to peek into the mind of the head honcho who ran the publication I spent a giant chunk of my college years interning.

Her quote brought me back to the last couple years of high school where I had two jobs. One was at Maggie Moo's (look it up it's pretty much like Cold Stone but better!!), and the other was at Friendly's working the "Fountain" area. Basically, I was making sundaes and scooping ice cream cones. I was a true ice cream connoisseur by graduation! I worked at both jobs during the week and weekend. My boss at Maggie Moo's was pretty flexible with me even after he promoted me to Shift Lead (**pats self on back**), so that was a blessing.

Anyway, on top of all the ridiculous amount of extra curricular activities I had (seriously. What was wrong with me?!), I felt the need to add two more loads of burden on my back. I look back and ask myself, "Why did I have two jobs? Why did I subject myself to that much stress?"

Simply put, it's because I needed money for many necessities (HELLO, PROM ANYONE?!). What teen doesn't need money? But I thought about this deeper to find out what's at the root of my hustler attitude—na, na, na, diva is the female version of a hustler—and I realized what it is.

You see, certain life experiences have made me do or not do certain things. For example, I don't eat cheese because my brother got food poisoning from a McDonald's cheese burger and I'm sure it was because of McDonald's and not the cheese, but this resonated in my mind to never eat cheese and it eventually turned into me hating the smell and taste of cheese. And I remember an incident that turned me into a hustler diva.

I was 12 and watching one of my best friends go to work at her dad's company to pass the summer days. She also would receive a steady pay check. I wasn't intrigued by the fact she got paid, but I thought it was cool she was being "all grown up" and working. Man was I wrong about wanting to grow up. Anyway, up until I was 14 and got my first real job as a day-camp counselor, I asked my parents if I could get a job and their answer was always no.

Boy would I love to have my childhood back for just a split second.

Why I'll Be Seeing 'Pariah'

Pariah is a movie about a black girl who realizes she is a Lesbian, but finds it hard to come out (be her true self) to her family for many reasons.

1. Black culture isn't exactly welcoming to the gay community.

2. No family ever actually wants to find out their daughter fancies females.

3. Society says being gay is wrong.

4. Being against the norm is terrifying.

That said, I will be seeing this movie. No I'm not gay (but does that really matter?). I think it's time Hollywood starts showcasing movies that share diverse stories of black women. The reason society sees black women (black people really) in such a certain way is because of what is depicted on TV and the movie screens. Hence, the reason I started my new blog The Token Black Chick.

I'm not going to go off on a "woe is me as a black woman" rant because nothing is worse than a self-loathing, complaining [insert group generalizing term]. It's just a matter of fact that certain type of movies are made with black women in them and they are either scorned, angry, self-righteous, too-hood, mad at a man, have love issues, and etc. Sure there are those few films that aren't like that, but for the most part... that's how it is. Certain type of movies make great sales and that's a fact. So... I understand.

Needless to say, I will be seeing Pariah not only because it is a movie that is telling a different black woman story, but it is telling a story about a young woman coming of age and finding it hard to be the person she wants to be. It's a tale we all need to see and learn from.